Hint: Read the descriptive list of needs before taking the QUIZ!

This is a quiz that helps you figure out which emotional needs are more and less important to you in relationships. It is based on a theory that splits up emotional (relationship) needs into 10 categories. Here are those categories with a short description of each:

• AFFECTION: The expression of love in words, cards, gifts, hugs, kisses, and courtesies; creating an environment that clearly and repeatedly expresses love.
  
• SEXUAL FULFILLMENT: A sexual experience that brings out a predictably enjoyable sexual response in both of you that is frequent enough for both of you.
  
• CONVERSATION: Talking about events of the day, personal feelings, and plans for the future; showing interest in your favorite topics of conversation; balancing conversation; using it to inform, investigate, and understand you; and giving you undivided attention.
  
• RECREATIONAL COMPANIONSHIP: Developing interest in your favorite recreational activities, learning to be proficient in them, and joining you in those activities.
  
• HONESTY AND OPENNESS: Revealing positive and negative feelings, events of the past, daily events and schedule, plans for the future; not leaving a false impression; answering questions truthfully and completely.
  
• PHYSICAL ATTRACTIVENESS: Keeping physically fit with diet and exercise, wearing hair and clothing in a way that you find attractive and tasteful.
  
• FINANCIAL SUPPORT: The provision of financial resources to house, feed, and clothe your family at a standard of living acceptable to you, but avoiding travel and working hours that are unacceptable to you.
  
• DOMESTIC SUPPORT: Creation of a home environment for you that offers refuge from the stresses of life; management of the home and care of the children -if any are at home- including but not limited to cooking meals, washing dishes, washing and ironing clothes, housecleaning.
  
• FAMILY COMMITMENT: Scheduling sufficient time and energy for the moral and educational development of your children; reading to them, taking them on frequent outings, developing the skill in appropriate child-training methods and discussing those methods with you; avoiding any child-training methods or disciplinary action that does not have your enthusiastic support.
  
• ADMIRATION: Respecting, valuing and appreciating you clearly and often. Those are the 10 emotional needs about everything in relationships is categorized under...

Now, for this test, the questions each will mention a pair of two emotional needs. The idea is that if you are to be in a relationship with someone for the rest of your life, and you can have 9 out of 10 needs satisfied, but not one of the two mentioned in the question, which would you decide to have satisfied and which not? If you would choose the first need mentioned in the question, pick yes, if you would choose the second, pick no. Try to avoid the not sure option. Then, use the importance slider in the following way: If the choice between the two was easy for you because one matters a lot more then the other, give the question a high importance. If on the other hand the choice was very hard, give the question a low importance.

My #1 is: Conversation
My #2 is: Admiration
My #3 is: Honesty and Openness
My #4 is: Affection
My #5 is: Family Commitment
My #6 is: Sexual Fulfilment
My #7 is: Domestic Support
My #8 is: Financial Support
My #9 is: Physical Attractiveness
My #10 is: Recreational Companionship

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What would the world be, once bereft
Of wet and of wildness? Let them be left,
O let them be left, wildness and wet;
Long live the weeds and the wilderness yet. - Gerard Manley Hopkins

My #1 is: Conversation (It starts and ends with conversation. Planning together counts.)
My #2 is: Admiration (Well, we have to matter to each other!)
My #3 is: Affection (I'll die if he won't let me hug him.)
My #4 is: Honesty and Openness (Should be number 3.)
My #5 is: Family Commitment (Just don't interfere with my method of child discipline, ok?)
My #6 is: Sexual Fulfillment (I'm only human.)
My #7 is: Domestic Support (Cuddling is more important than doing the dishes? I surprise myself.)
My #8 is: Physical Attractiveness (He has to smell good. XD)
My #9 is: Recreational Companionship (Cooking - definitely.)
My #10 is: Financial Support (It's odd, considering I'm a woman.)

_________________

My #1 is: Conversation
My #2 is: Honesty and Openness
My #3 is: Admiration
My #4 is: Affection
My #5 is: Sexual Fulfillment
My #6 is: Financial Support
My #7 is: Physical Attractiveness
My #8 is: Domestic Support
My #9 is: Family Commitment
My #10 is: Recreational Companionship

Some of the choices stayed undecided like Family Commitment, no idea what that means yet.

^

Family Commitment is everything to do with your children pretty much.
Teaching your children, interacting with them, "consulting" with you about teaching and disciplinary methods etc.


---

I had quite a hard time deciding between a lot of these to be honest, I might come back to this later.

My #1 is: Honesty and Openness
My #2 is: Affection
My #3 is: Family Commitment
My #4 is: Recreational Companionship
My #5 is: Sexual Fulfillment
My #6 is: Conversation
My #7 is: Financial Support
My #8 is: Physical Attractiveness
My #9 is: Domestic Support
My #10 is: Admiration

I'm a bit surprised though it seems accurate after thinking it through.

Funnu how many parts I don't really think about...

My #1 is: Affection ( )
My #2 is: Honesty and Openness (Didn't see this coming. )
My #3 is: Conversation (Blah blah blah)
My #4 is: Admiration (Can't take it, but keeps my feet on the ground and head in the clouds)
My #5 is: Physical Attractiveness (I'm visual! xD)
My #6 is: Sexual Fulfillment
My #7 is: Domestic Support (Honey... I need to finish my epic plans and strange schemes, could you clean today?)
My #8 is: Family Commitment (Surprise, again)
My #9 is: Financial Support (...I know we really need money but...)
My #10 is: Recreational Companionship ( I'm not so sure about this)

_________________
-(Fantastic! Everything is beautiful!)

Read: "Lovie, you know I think you're the greatest, but will you please get the !@#$-ing !@#$ out of my art studio?"

Just kidding.

Or maybe, you might end up with an artist like yourself and then you can make beautiful art together!

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Baby I like it

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-(Fantastic! Everything is beautiful!)

I don't like it. Maybe it's because I skipped some choices.

My #1 is: Physical Attractiveness
I would drop it to #5 or 6 not sure myself It's also possible that I don't realize how important it is to me.
My #2 is: Affection
My #3 is: Family Commitment
My #4 is: Recreational Companionship
My #5 is: Sexual Fulfillment
My #6 is: Honesty and Openness
I would raise it to #4
My #7 is: Admiration
My #8 is: Domestic Support
My #9 is: Financial Support
My #10 is: Conversation
I don't need that stuff

I'm dissapointed but I'm not sure what about, myself or this quiz.

My #1 is: Affection
My #2 is: Family Commitment
My #3 is: Honesty and Openness
My #4 is: Admiration
My #5 is: Sexual Fulfillment
My #6 is: Conversation
My #7 is: Recreational Companionship
My #8 is: Physical Attractiveness
My #9 is: Domestic Support
My #10 is: Financial Support

*high fives your top 3*

Emotional parallelism. That's probably one reason why you two got along so well with each other. +

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^ Hmm, I think it's partly that I discovered a lot more about myself during the development of the relationship. It's likely that my answers would have been very different in my pre-relationship state.

It's very good to see similar values/needs there though.

#1 - Affection
#2 - Recreational Companionship (Surprised me. )
#3 - Honesty and Openness
#4 - Admiration
#5 - Conversation
#6 - Sexual Fulfillment
#7 - Domestic Support
#8 - Family Commitment (Why's this way down here? D< )
#9 - Physical Attractiveness
#10 - Financial Support

Interesting to see, despite some patterns, a variety of different results. I shall add mine to the pile.

#1. Conversation
By a landslide. Can't say I'm surprised, to be honest. I'm sure most of you expected it of me too I'm reminded of something where you had to choose your favourite thing out of a list of 16 activities, and each corresponded to an MBTI type. INFPs were 'A conversation with a friend'. Even outside of MBTI, there's rarely an involving discussion I can leave without feeling several times more energised.

#2. Honesty and Openness
Honesty really is the best policy. It's the foundation of everything. I don't often open myself up deeply but when I do I'm nothing if not honest. Without this there can be no real communication, and without communication there can be no relationship.

#3. Family Commitment
Insofar as this pertains more to children than relatives, I agree. I can't put it above #1 or #2 because they are far more encompassing and apply to wider areas of life. That's not to say I wouldn't bring those attitudes into my family environment as well. Anyone who knows me well enough knows that parenthood or the treatment of children are things I feel very passionately about. Should I ever find myself in a position to have a child, it's not a decision I'd make lightly. It'd be complete commitment and damn the complications.

#4. Recreational Companionship
Kind of true. As fun as solitary activities are, it'd be a little depressing if I couldn't at least share my experiences with people. Also, doing things together with people on my wavelength can be really fulfilling, just a shame it doesn't come around more often. Group activities can be fun, but depending on the people involved, can lack substance. One-to-one is good stuff.

#5. Affection
Well, of course this has to come in somewhere! It doesn't even have to be explicit, but being in a positive and emotionally reciprocal environment can really help me glow from the inside out. I'm sure many people feel the same way. I can endure toxicity, doesn't mean I enjoy it, nor that I function at my best.

#6. Physical Attractiveness
I'm a little surprised. Maybe I didn't want to come off as being too unkempt by my answers. In retrospect, maybe I'd shove this down a little, and sexual fulfilment up a little. That being said, I don't think I look bad, and do really enjoy it when I look good. I enjoy looking smart, but not overly formal. I think that suits me. Too bad my wardrobe isn't really in line with my fledgling sense of style, nor do I feel any significant compulsion to correct this.

#7. Domestic Support
Meh. This falls under the moniker of necessary evils. I do believe I could cope on my own, despite what limited experiences at University would have others believe. I'd definitely make it up as I went along, though, and probably wouldn't be a model example of housekeeping.

#8. Financial Support
I'm not saying this isn't important. I'm just saying that everything else is more important.

#9. Sexual Fulfillment
Yeah, this should probably be a little higher. Alas, I'm as yet uninitiated in the sexual arts. My time will come, I'm sure. Or not. Who knows? It'd be a shame if it didn't, though. Part of me would never forgive myself, I know it.

#10. Admiration
Deserving of its last place. Affirmation is nice, but isn't really necessary. When I'm motivated (another story entirely), it's almost always intrinsically so. I've had that drive since my childhood. More important than active admiration is simply not trying to wear down my natural esteem by insults and unnecessary or exaggerated criticism.

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We are beyond our own ability to define ourselves - we can only describe what we think we are.

I'm not surprised. You have excellent skills in that department from what I've seen on the 'verse, just like a good INxP should.

I was surprised it was [i]my number one - I thought affection would come out on top. But I tend to talk my closest friends' ears off, so it must be accurate.

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I think my results are skewed because I didn't know how to rate family involvement and domestic support properly, seeing as how I like living by myself and don't want kids. I think that's how financial support got bumped up so high, I just kept picking that over the other two.

My #1 is: Conversation - No surprise here, a good mind makes me swoon.
My #2 is: Admiration - I'd switch this with affection, though I do need to be supported or I start to get mopey.
My #3 is: Physical Attractiveness - I'm a sucker for hot dudes, what can I say. I'd put it down to 4 though.
My #4 is: Honesty and Openness - I believe in letting people keep their secrets, but knowing that I'm not getting cheated on is pretty important.
My #5 is: Financial Support - Would rank this one as lower, I'm self-sufficient.
My #6 is: Sexual Fulfillment - I'd rank this on par with physical attractiveness.
My #7 is: Affection - I'd put this at #2, I sometimes forget I'm loved unless someone reminds me.
My #8 is: Domestic Support - Don't want to live with anyone.
My #9 is: Family Commitment - Don't want kids.
My #10 is: Recreational Companionship - No need for this, I like my space.

conversation.... honesty and openness.... admiration

i find it weird that people would prize family commitment or "domestic assistance" above those and some others. get a maid/nanny >.>

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Isn't it pretty to think so?

That must be it then.



We all need to give and receive TLC once in a while...

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