oh dear....not my kind of music at all, mykl! My ears......!



interesting topic though. I've NEVER considered myself an extrovert...I got something like 99% introvert on the MBTI test. But reading the above, there are extrovert-like qualities I possess. For example, I *do* initiate conversation with random people...people on the bus, in a lift, in a waiting room, etc. Not all the time, but I do, and I don't feel awkward or embarrassed about doing so. The trouble is, I think people find me a bit odd or strange because I gravitate towards saying really bizarre things to people. I just find it amusing. is that weird?
I'm also quite good at gently bringing someone who's VERY quiet "out of their shell" and making them feel comfortable.

On the other hand, in situations where it "matters", I'm one of the most socially awkward people around. For example, meeting my partner's family, I was literally shaking...and sooo quiet. It took me several occasions of meeting them before I could speak a bit more comfortably. I've known them for 4 years now and they're lovely people but I still get nervous before they visit! In new employment situations, job interviews, meetings, new classes etc I clam up and get very quiet/shy/anxious. But if I'm in a cafe with my friend I can quite happily start a conversation with people we don't know on the adjacent table. Or if a friend introduces their friend to me, I can be quite chatty and open. When I'm with a group of close friends I can also get quite hyper and bubbly.

I love my alone time though. My partner and I are together a lot but we both often sit and read or go on our computers rather than talk (he's an INFJ). Even still I need a few evenings a week of just being on my own in my own space.

Is all this typical for an introvert or am I more of an extrovert than I realised?

I think, at least from what I've read, is that it is typical for an introvert, and especially for an INFP. I think, sometimes, we are a bit 'stuck' as well. We want these great, deep relationships, but then we need A LOT of alone time. I feel like I always have a balancing act going on. That also rings true for my Enneagram 4, though.

We just found out my husband is an ENFP (E 2)! We have been married for 13 years and most of it has been pretty happy. He does seem to need some quiet time but he just told me the other day that he NEVER gets tired of being with people . Thankfully, he has always been very understanding of my need for alone time. We can get incredibly silly and off the wall together and he is very charming and charismatic when we are in social situations. I kind of feed off of that instead of letting my anxiety take over and I think we're a good match.