I was thinking about this today.. Suppose a close friend or relative was dying and made a final request of you, something that you normally wouldn't want to do or would strongly inconvenience you or negatively impact your life. They ask you to promise to do whatever it is so that they can die peacefully.

What would you do? Would you agree and then carry it out because you made a promise? pretend to agree so that they can die in peace and then not do it? Or refuse the request at the time (presumably done with kindness and sensitivity)?

it doesn't seem fair for the person dying to make such a request of someone. If I promised, I would try to follow through, but if it was a major inconvenience and something uncomfortable for me to do, I would wait for the most opportune time to do so.

Yep, the assumption is that request is also unfair and that the timing is bad... but now the request is out there and needs a response.

I think my personal response would be, "I'll do what I can", which doesn't commit to anything in particular, but does indicate a willingness to help within my capability.

i would tell them i would do it and then decide later depending on *how* inconveniencing it is, and how close to the person i am. my first thought was that i would have no problem making the promise and then not following through after they died, but if it was someone really close to me that would be pretty disrespectful of their memory and i might feel guilty for it. in general though, i don't think its wrong to lie to people on their deathbeds if it means they die in peace...

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Isn't it pretty to think so?

Well, that's a tough one. If it was truly something that was severely inconvenient and/or would be very difficult for me to do (i.e. something that would grind against my conscience), then I would have to tell them that I would try or that I would have to think about it. Sounds like something cruel to say to a dying person, but I'm not to keen on lying no matter the circumstances. It's just something I hate. If I said I would try, then I would. Not saying how hard I would try though.

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My first instinct was:



But...



...seems the better option.

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What would the world be, once bereft
Of wet and of wildness? Let them be left,
O let them be left, wildness and wet;
Long live the weeds and the wilderness yet. - Gerard Manley Hopkins

What if the thing they promise me to do is morally wrong? I'm okay with carrying out a promise that inconveniences me if it's still the right thing to do. But if they ask me to lie, cheat, steal, kill? Certainly not.

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"It is a melancholy fact that massive works of the intellect do not spring from the abstract workings of the brain and the imagination; they are deeply rooted in the personality." -Paul Johnson

INFP, 4w5 sx/sp